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Isolation Doesn’t Have to Be Desolation
by Janice Ferrante, the Queen of KAOS
A popular reason that most women stay home to work is so
that they won’t have to leave their kids and home to go to work.
Another reason is to leave the “rat race” of 9-5, become our own boss and
get to work wearing a bathrobe and fuzzy slippers!
Some of us are just natural born homebodies.
But some days it can seem a double-edged sword.
Those days I wonder if I have fulfilled my potential by staying home.
Those days I wonder if I am “less than” the other “working” mothers who have
managed a family, achieved financial independence, a close network of
friends and a closet full of great clothes!
A nagging feeling that I am not “out there” enough, that I am “in here” too
Most days I naturally fall onto the far end of the hermit scale. I enjoy my
own time. Immensely.
I live outside of a small town that doesn’t have a lot going on anyway, so
it isn’t a huge problem for me. But as the years pass, every once in awhile
I ask myself… am I going to have regrets later?
IT’S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT BEING EFFICIENT
Sometimes it’s easy to forget that time management isn’t always about being
organized and efficient. It is also about re-energizing yourself, motivating
yourself, refreshing yourself and being sure that you don’t depend too much
on yourself for inspiration; there is a whole world out there.
If you find yourself wondering what you’re missing “out there”, here are
some suggestions that will help to get you out and about, make new friends,
and even help you to expand your business at the same time.
Join your local small business group - There are often groups set up
particularly for women entrepreneurs in most areas these days. You will
learn a lot, get support, network, promote your business and you get to “do
office attire” if you want to!
Volunteer – There are many places and capacities that you can volunteer even
a small amount of your time. It will invigorate you, giving you a sense of
connection, contribution and accomplishment.
Go to school part time – I did this last year for a few months. It really
gave me a new confidence and I learned a lot that I am presently applying to
my own business. Not to mention that you learn new skills, and they look
good on a resume should you ever need one. Actually, almost any extra
curricular that you can do outside of the home will add to your resume if
you should have need of one. If you can manage a night course one or two
nights a week, that is just as good.
Join an organization - Nothing will make you feel more alive than supporting
and mingling with like minded people, especially ones with a cause. If there
is a group in your area who stand for something you would like to get
involved with, go for it!
Buddy Up – If you have a friend with similar interests, why not make a
regular time for you to get together, with or without the kids. Make it a
time that you create something; maybe have a theme for each visit or an
ongoing project. You can have some fun and get something done at the same
Create a Study Group – This can be a reading group, a craft group, even an
exercise class – almost anything where a group of similar minds get together
on a regular basis and exchange ideas.
If you think about it for a while, I’m sure you can think of even more ideas
of your own.
The main idea is to expand your reach, your mind and get a breath of fresh
air, a new perspective.
MAKE IT WORK FOR YOU
Most of us have varying degrees of sociability, some need very little
interaction with other people and others need a lot.
Sociably inclined people are often very good at dealing with people and do
well with sales and marketing. They greatly benefit from ongoing social
interaction – keeping their social skills and connections “up to date”, as
well as keeping from depression or resentment at being “stuck” at home all
People who don’t have such a large social need are often good at the nuts
and bolts of things and creative endeavors, and surprise themselves with
enjoyed time out and their contributions on a social level. And vow to do it
again. Soon. Make sure you do.
No matter where you fit on the scale, examine it and see how you can make it
work for you.
Be sure that the kids are well looked after.
After that, don’t feel guilty or that you are wasting your time.
Anything that makes you happy, keeps you fresh and therefore more productive
is time well spent, for you and your family.
Janice Ferrante is the Queen of KAOS. You can learn more
about how to Conquer KAOS and take CONTROL by visiting her website at
http://www.queen-of-kaos.com. Also be sure to sign up for her free ezine
containing more practical tips, articles and resources at